quotations about beards
Jimmy wearing a beard is like Beth wearing one of her big, black, shapeless sweaters that covers her butt. But she's not wearing one of those sweaters tonight. She's wearing her Goldie Hawn dress, and Jimmy's wearing a beard. Interesting.
LISA GENOVA
Love Anthony
Growing a beard is like undertaking a flight. First you have the idea which you dare not reveal to a soul. You feel that there will be wide open spaces you cannot cover. If it fails, have you the courage to face the condescending pity which people have for failures? If it succeeds, have you the endurance to be pleasant to everyone who asks why you did it?
SIR FRANCIS CHICHESTER
Lonely Sea and Sky
All the men in my family were born bearded, and most of the women.
W.C. FIELDS
attributed, The English Shaving Co.
Ere on thy chin the springing beard began
To spread a doubtful down, and promise man.
MATTHEW PRIOR
An Ode to the Memory of the Honourable Colonel George Villiers
This beard is like a winter night, long, dark, and cold.
GEORGE LAMB
New Arabian Nights Entertainments
There is something about a man with a beard I cannot stand. No particular reason for it. Prejudice, I suppose. I feel the same way about cats.
CHARLES WILLEFORD
Pick-Up
It's a little tragic, it's a little weird
ZZ Top are prisoners of their beards
Imagine them weightless in outerspace
Beards and shades flyin' all over the place
CHRISTINE LAVIN
"Prisoners of Their Hairdos"
You may wear, if you choose, a beard pick-a-devant,
A beard like a hammer, or jagg'd like a saw--
A beard call'd "cathedral," and shaped like a tile,
Which the widow in Hudibras served to beguile.
A beard like a dagger--nay, don't be afraid--
A beard like a bodkin, a beard like a spade;
A beard like a sugar-loaf, beard like a fork,
A beard like a Hebrew, a beard like a Turk.
Any one of these beards may be yours if you list--
According to fancy you trim it or twist.
As to colour, that matters, I ween, not a pin--
But a bushy black beard is the surest to win.
THOMAS CAMPBELL
"The Ballad of the Beard"
Mendham was a cadaverous man with a magnificent beard. He looked, indeed, as though he had run to beard as a mustard plant does to seed.
H.G. WELLS
The Wonderful Visit
For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very narrow concept of what god can be, and it was damn close to an old man with a beard.
JOHN CLEESE
The Gospel According to John Cleese
If you think that to grow a beard is to acquire wisdom, a goat is at once a complete Plato.
LUCIAN
Greek Anthology
There was an old man with a beard,
Who said: "It is just as I feared--
Two Owls and a Hen,
Four Larks and a Wren
Have all built their nests in my beard.
EDWARD LEAR
Book of Nonsense
Unless you're in an early seventies-era Eagles cover band, a founding member of a religious cult, or sleeping under a bridge in Seattle, lose the beard and get a haircut. Power doesn't have time for any form of hirsute hipster self expression.
ARI GOLD
The Gold Standard: Rules to Rule By
The abundance of beards in periods of social unrest, times of revolt or upheaval, should be noted. It's the handiest way people have of making themselves mysterious.
MIKHAIL SEBASTIAN
For Two Thousand Years
Now Jove, in his next commodity of hair, send thee a beard!
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Twelfth Night
Beards are, like tusks or antlers, secondary sexual characters but, unlike these, they are not much use for intra-specific combat.
RICHARD M. WILSON
"On Beards", New Scientist, January 21, 1982
'Tis merry in hall
Where beards wag all.
THOMAS TUSSER
Hundred Points of Good Husbandry
The only reason to shave your beard is the joy of growing it again.
ANONYMOUS
Any man can start a beard. A true man never finishes one.
ANONYMOUS
His beard is like the thistle of the pastures, when the northwind whistleth on the hills. Ewen hath mowed it with his cutlass, as the wildgoat goat croppeth the flower.
JAMES MACPHERSON
The Fingal of Ossian